T.M. Shannon

I’d like to acknowledge the Traditional Owners of the land I’m on, the Cabrogal people of the Darug nation, and all Aboriginal and Torres Straight Islanders, and I pay my respects to Elders past, present, and emerging.

Australia is a land with over 50 thousand years of history, and I support all efforts for reconciliation and correcting the past wrongs of colonisation.

Hi everyone,

Yep, another month gone, and I’m edging closer to the birthday month and 10 years with my company. Surprisingly, I’m feeling okay about the birthday, not my most favourite time of year, but working at a place for so long is such a turnaround from moving jobs every three years.

And with nothing much to say in this part, I’m gonna make like my alarm just went off and take my doses. Hope you enjoy the musings!

A Dose of Literature and Gaming

I’m still on holiday from Three Ways, and I don’t know how I feel about not having a project front-and-centre, though I’ve picked at a few ideas in my downtime, and I’ve got one skeleton outline done and delved into the lore on two other projects.

It’s worked out in reading time, and I’m picking my way through Wuthering Heights, and in 7 chapters I’ve been between pitiful, vulnerable, unsure Heathcliff, and obsessive, furious, needs a psychiatric hold Heathcliff, along with a raft of toxic characters.

My goodness they’re full of cruelty and shiftiness, there’s no hiding the severe racism involved against Heathcliff, and I’m stuck wondering if these people purely came out of Emily Brontё’s head, or did she latch onto existing Yorkshire mores and real people?

It’s already 5 stars to me. This is the character depth and pacing I want to channel, and though I’m only reading chapters here and there, I’m mentally taking notes on character interplay, villainous genesis and motivation. And the moors? Gloriously bleak.

But the fact Emily Brontё is speaking to me in common English from 1847—apart from Mr. Lockwood’s tl;dr speeches, great characterisation by the way—gives me hope for my everyday prose and atmosphere, which I know is currently good or there-abouts.

Do I even hold a candle to the brilliance? Probably not. Will I one day? Maybe. But it’d be great for one of my works to speak to a reader 179 years later.

Apart from the reading there’s the gaming, and I’m picking through Skyrim again but not really into it—well, I do a few quests then give it a rest—but as usual, I’m married to Ysolda and living in Solitude with the orphan kids, and off on adventures with my vampy side-bae Serana.

Granted my playthrough is fun and I’m getting around in third person view for a change, and testament to how great this game is, especially thanks to the Shouting feature, I’m still playing it 25 years since release, and Partysnax is still the G. O. A. T.

Still, I need new games to see what my RTX 5080 is really capable of. And I might’ve found a recent release for that task courtesy of its prequel.

A Dose of Playing History

I heard of Kingdom Come: Deliverance because of course I did, and it was a sometimes thought but I never looked at it until last year, when it was on sale on Steam. $15 including the DLC’s except HD Textures later, I fell into a brutal learning curve that frustrated me no end.

After several restarts, I’m free of the prologue where you still end up getting your backside kicked, and got into Rattay overburdened with loot, sold my stuff, and went looking for a church. I found St Matthew’s easily, went in, and hit the, “I’m really here,” moment.

Set in Bohemia 1403, KCD is an RPG like no other. During the time of Sigismund II’s raids trying to destroy his half-brother Wenceslas IV’s allies, you’re a blacksmith’s son swept up in an adventure in a real place with real things to do.

No magic because, well, real world, there’s sword fighting, there’s theft and lockpicking, there’s stealth archery, there’s alchemy and potions, all the toys needed to get medieval on someone’s backside. And now that it’s sunk into me, I can’t wait to finish it and download the sequel.

The medieval St Matthew’s church brought to life in KCD has a white exterior, and inside has no pews, no stained glass, the altar is right at the back, and there are some brilliant frescos—Original Sin, St Matthew, the Crucifixion, St John, even the Last Judgement across the arch.

Just being there was amazing, and KCD’s feature is history, whcih lives large in the Codex describing life in the Middle Ages, historical figures, and the vivid nature of the Holy Roman Empire and the European realm.

The Western Schism sees a Pope in Rome and a Pope in Agincourt. You can visit a bathhouse for some washing and laundry, or to have some fun with a wench. Weapons, armour, and horses are expensive. And the longsword fighting is based on the German school, a favourite of mine.

Yeah, I got frustrated with the controls early on. You can die during the escape from Skalitz to Talmberg. A fight early on pulverised me, hence all the goes to get it right and leave Skalitz with four lockpicks because you need them to steal some armour in Talmberg to go back to Skalitz.

But you and your friends throw poop at some guy’s lovely, whitewashed house, a noble Lady empathises with you over losing your parents, and the scenery and buildings are beautiful. The story, too, is rich, the characters are lively, the dialogue is great, and I’m fully immersed.

Thanks, Deep Silver and Warhorse. I might’ve been antagonistic towards your game at the beginning, but getting to live history and run/ride around your world’s Cry Engine beauty is an absolute gem. I wish I’d bought it on release.

A Dose of Traditional Rejection

So, Three Ways is gathering dust, and while I’m having difficulty adjusting to non-project life after being so focussed on the overhaul, it’s a well-deserved breath of fresh air. But it isn’t a time to rest, and I have a new issue to contend with—finding beta readers.

I never approached betas with my fantasy The Torment, The Shadow, The Heart, much less getting a manuscript assessment, and apart from editing, it was a pantsed experience where TSH died a quiet death.

This new thing comes with some epic anxiety and dread. Here’s me putting my baby out into the Public Test Realm for what will be brutal but hopefully constructive feedback. It also means me dealing with the traditional publishing reality of getting rejected.

I’m only at the start of the process, and I’ve only emailed three potential betas found on the Writing NSW site, and it’s already nope. Cue catastrophising, I’m already looking at 3 months of searching before I give up, but while it’s disheartening, I get it.

One beta hasn’t replied, but I reckon that’s because I’m a needle in a haystack of a Gmail inbox. One is currently on maternity leave and might not be free until next year. And the last, who replied to me, is fully booked out.

Granted, it’s not the soul crushing of a form letter agency rejection, but it is me facing a world of time constraints, being in competition with others needing services, and wondering if the next email sent is another nope.

But even though I’m going to self-publish, I need this experience to build patience, a thick skin, and the determination to keep putting myself out there if I’m going to build an audience and get to a future point of querying with agents.

Plus, I’ve gone through the extra step of including my first chapter in emails, and that meant looking at my manuscript for the first time in weeks, and oh dear did I cringe. Three lines in a row of he did this/dialogue that I have to trim and mix around? Yeesh, was I worried.

What gets me past that is me going to betas and an editor to address these problems, and turn Three Ways into a great book. It’ll never be a perfect story, and I may hit publish with misgivings, but knowing I’m taking the right steps is a comfort for me.

Still, wish me luck, pray for me, and send halp. This journey is just beginning.

A Dose of Au Revoir

And there you have it, another blog churned out and released a day late, not bad for Bipolar/ADHD and not being on an enshrined timeframe. Maybe the September post will get written through the month, but I’m not holding my breath on that

As always, whoever, whatever, and wherever you are, take care, or keep holding on and getting the help you need—and don’t forget to subscribe, add your comments, and follow me on Bluesky.

Yours,
T. M.